Lovely Insults

"I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash."

"I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that."

"Thank you for your input. (Then change the subject.)"

"My days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle."

"Stop wasting your breath."

"There is nothing you can do that will make me think less of you."

"I envy people who haven't met you."

"I've been called worse things by better people."

"Everyone who ever loved you was wrong."

"Now I know why people talk about you behind your back."

"I don't know what your problem is, but I bet it's hard to pronounce."

"I am sure you did your best."

"I don't have the time or the crayons to explain this to you right now."

"Who do I have to donate money to get you help?"

"It's ok if you disagree with me, I can't force you to be right."

"I'm busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?"

"The last thing I want to do is hurt you... But it's still on the list."

"Your mom should've swallowed."

"You are unworthy of the lego you stepped on."

"Were you born this way or did you have an accident?"